May 2013
Fingers tensed then relaxed continuously as he approached, brow creased as digits held onto the cold, sturdy frame of his gun. “Who are you?”
This was … —This was absolutely the worst thing that could have happened to him.
Bucky. His best friend, Bucky, was alive — Only god could tell how he had survived or managed to come this far in time without aging a single day — and didn’t know who Steve was!
“It’s…. —Who are you?” Steve wasn’t stupid.
He’d seen more than enough to know that this could be an alien, a shape shifter, a robot, a new game Tony decided to play — Or simply just a horrible nightmare.
- russiaswintersecret
- wintery-buchanan-barnes
- thesgtjamesbarnes
“This must be a dream…
—There is no other way… I have to be dreaming.
Yes…
Yes, that’s it.”
Anonymous love revolution! This message is to let you know that at least one person out there loves you. Don't ever forget that fact. Pass this on to whoever you think deserves love and let's spark a revolution!
March 2013
Play
0:42
+ notacircusmonkey
[ Sharon smiles slightly ]
Hello there. What can I do for you?
I am…. —Looking for someone…? I think that’s the wrong address.. I am sorry for disturbing you..
[-pets you gently- I don't know if you remember me, but I used to have a dark!Peter Parker blog and we used to RP together. IloveyouandImissyoualot. <3]
Of course I remember you, love, and I’ve missed you a lot, too!
I really am sorry for being gone for so long..
((hey I'm willing to jump in and rp whenever you're ready?))
Hey! Well, I’m ready :D
notacircusmonkey said: Steve frowned but did what Tony asked him to while he kept watching the other male. “That is not what I came here for…” He muffled, before he easily lifted the post. “What did you do with this anyway?”
Maybe he’d forgotten Steve was a one-man army, and it’s really no skin off his back when he relinquishes the post to the other man’s hold, and pauses a moment to collect the flurry of thoughts in his mind in order the answer the simple question.
“Over there, in the corner, set it in the vice.”
There’s a short movement, and he directs the Captain towards the vices, settled in place for him to take the metal piping apart, and he motions for Steve to set it down, “-Now what did you come here for, because if this is another of Fury’s attempts to set us up on a play date, I’m a little busy-“
Curiously Stiles looked around in Tony’s not-so-little little crave and nodded, doing once again as he was told. He waited until Tony addressed him again and walked back to the scientist, not sure if he was impressed by all of these things here or just terrified. Probably both…
The soldier still wasn’t used to this new world and one of the many reasons he preferred avoiding Tony Stark was because he… —Well. He represented everything Steve was afraid off while he was at the same time everything Steve had left.
Okay, maybe Tony wasn’t ‘anything’ Steve had left, but looking at his face, he ended up thinking about Howard and if this wasn’t the closest he’d get to his friends from back then, he didn’t know what was.
“Excuse me…?” He knew that Tony was busy but what did that have to do anything with Fury wanting them to play…date? “I am not sure if … Nevermind. Director Fury asked me to come here and watch you doing…” He waved with his hands, gesturing at everything and nothing. “This.”
His eyes were back on Tony’s features and hands resting on his own sides before he tried his best to offer the other male a polite smile while he explained: “I’ve…brought a book with me. I’ll just sit somewhere, read, and go again.”
They both weren’t fans of each other. Neither did Tony die to spend time with Steve, nor did Steve… But it was an order. To spend time with Tony and watch him, and while reading a book, Steve could always look up now and then and see what the billionaire was doing.
It wasn’t like he’d understand much of it anyway, but he was convinced that this was, besides being a poor attempt of getting Steve out of the training room, Fury’s way of bringing the both of them together and probably even trying to get Tony to join S.H.I.E.L.D.
You and me both, buddy… You and me both…
—-Did I sleep for 70 years?
I shall sit here, feel guilty for dumping you precious people and wait until forgiveness rains.
“I feel like I have slept for another 70 years…”
January 2013
I am planing a ‘come back’. Fair warning!
<3 I love and miss you, guys.
Where are we going? To The Future! ( Closed )
Bucky knew coming here was dangerious,for both of them. He knew that once he saw Steve,he couldn’t go back. He couldn’t go back to ignoring the man’s existence,it was already hard enough for the last month in New York. Steve was the biggest part in Bucky’s life,ever since he met him. He was his rock,his angel,he reminded Bucky of what he was and what he wanted to become. He never wanted to be some famous celebrity,he just wanted to be as good as Steve. Inside.
The day he met Steve,was the day Bucky promised to himself and his new friend that he will protect him, whatever costs. No matter what,he promised that he will stay by his side,in good or bad. He promised he would take care of him,never leave his sight and always be his guardian angel. Unfortunately,he didn’t keep his promise.
He failed him,he left him to go alone on Johann. He ruined his life by making him sleep for seventy years. If both of them were there,things could’ve been different. Much different.
Bucky got lost in his thoughts,he didn’t even acknowledge the soldier coming back to the room. Once he felt his arm on his shoulder,he raised his head to look at the other.
”…No…” He replied,getting himself together and throwing in a light smile on his face.
”Right…” Bucky said,taking the cup and sipping the coffee from it. As soon as he placed it back on the table,he took a deep breath before speaking again. ”What I’m about to tell you…I don’t blame you if you change your mind about me. If you start hating me,if you want to kill me. I’ll let you do to me whatever you want,because I deserve it all..” He whispered,wincing a bit before taking another deep breath. ”I was frozen,like you were back then. The russians were looking for you where I fell,but found me. Armless. They took me in,gave me a bionic arm and brainwashed me. They created a new side of me,a side called The Winter Soldier. He is a killing machine,a russian killing machine. I was asleep,while he was in control over my body. He was awake only when there was a mission to be done. Once he got it,he would stop at nothing to finish it. He killed many people,many innocent people.” He swallowed. ”They gave me a super soldier serum,similar to yours. I barely age,that’s why I look so young. Because of the serum. I also have a bit of super strength and speed. It’s not as good as yours but its close.” The sergeant said,licking his bottom lip and looking down. ”He’s a killing machine,locked inside my mind. Sleeping,just waiting to come out to kill. H-He’s…a monster.”
Steve listened to the things his best friend told him, a serious look spread over his features before he bit down on his lower lip and nodded from time to time. He couldn’t imagine how horrible the last 70 years had been for Bucky…
—He should have known! Should have known that Bucky couldn’t have died easily and should have asked for Fury to tell him that they did find his body..
Instead of that he went to the grave stone with Bucky’s name on it and talked… Talked about his problems with this time and everything.
But now he was here… He was here and that meant things would be normal agian. They would watch out for each other!
“You are a stupid Jerk, my friend…” The blond man whispered before leaning over the table and squeezing Bucky’s shoulder once again while hugging him as good as he could from where he was.
“I would never kill you. It wasn’t you who did those things, Bucky. There is no reason to blame yourself!”
Where are we going? To The Future! ( Closed )
Bucky sat down on the chair. The room seemed like it was the dinning room. Plus the kitchen was near. He knew he was going to have to have to tell Steve how he survived all these years. How he still looks the same but his mind isn’t,his body isn’t. He placed his one hand on the table and the other hid behind it. The bionic arm. It would be best if Steve found out from Bucky telling him and then showing,instead of just walking in and seeing a metal arm on the table.
Everything in here reminded him of Steve. Probably because it was similar to his old apartment. Except the technology here,he didn’t understand it either but he didn’t mind. He learned how to use a laptop and TV,and a few other things.
Once he heard the other’s words,he couldn’t help but lower his head in shame. Yes shame,shame of what he had become. What he had inside of him,what he did over the past fifty years. It was horrible. He was afraid,afraid that once Steve heard,he was going to kick him out and never want to see him again. That he was going to track him down and revenge all the people he killed while being under the Winter Soldier’s control and the Red Rooms.
”I don’t think that’s a good idea.” James replied,in a serious tone that was followed by a hard swallow. Both his hands were under the table now,he was looking down at them. He didn’t remember much,but he remembered enough so he could tell Steve what exactly The Winter Soldier is and what he did. Everything was still a blur for him,but unfortunately the worst stuff he remembers. As always.
There was no way Steve would ever push Bucky away from him. The man had been his whole life until the war begun. Bucky had always protected him, always gave him a shelter and a home… —His apartment back then in Brooklyn had been nothing if it hadn’t been for Bucky coming over and the both man talking, laughing and Steve drawing pictures while listening to Bucky’s newest stories.
He had missed his friend more than he would ever be able to describe it, had mourned him and almost lost himself in his sorrow —But he had known that Bcuky would have wanted him to keep fight. He couldn’t have given up. And thank god he hadn’t. Because now the both of them were here… At that place that Steve refused to see as his home —His home had been 70 years ago, he wasn’t even supposed to be alive. But he was… And so was Bucky.
Once the super soldier saw how his friend was sitting there, he leaned over the table and placed a hand on James’ shoulder, squeezing it gently —He was lucky that it was his normal arm since other wise Steve would have jumped away and start believing that Bucky wasn’t real at all.
“It never is. But that never stopped you from telling me anyway, did it?”
The blonde was flashing a genuine and soft smile at his best friend and hoped that he would let him in again. It was obvious that the man had done things he didn’t wanted to —Steve new Bucky well too good as that he wouldn’t know what that look on his face meant.
“I’m ready to listen whenever you are ready to talk.” The coffee was ready, Steve got the both of them each one mug out, filled them and gave one of them to Bucky before sitting down on the opposite chair to him. “If you wish, I can start..?”
There’s always something I work on, and Pepper always trying to make me do the papaer work. But these are boring for me.
Oh…Of course. {nods slowly}
I… —I probably should go again… I bet Director Fury needs me..
Good. I’m glad to hear that.
Bored… Mostly.
Is there nothing you work on? Pepper trying to make you work harder? Things like that?
Where are we going? To The Future! ( Closed )
Bucky stood there,frozen. His head down like he was feeling guilty. And he was. He was feeling so guilty for leaving Steve,it almost tore him apart. He didn’t stand like that for long.
One second he was standing there like that,alone. The next one,these big,strong,warm arms were wrapped around him. A head leaning on his chest just like in the old days.
Did he really do that? Did he really just hug him and lower himself to leave his head on Bucky’s chest? The man was to this day,full of suprises. He couldn’t believe it,he just couldn’t.
Bucky threw in the biggest smile he could and wrapped his own arms around Steve’s neck. One hand holding him as tightly as tightly as he could while his bionic one patted the other on the back. He looked down and nuzzled his nose against the Captain’s hair. It smelled so good,Steve felt so good in his arms. He missed this,he missed this alot.
”You’re not dreaming kiddo!” He replied.
The minutes they spent in each other’s arms,were one of the best minutes in Bucky’s life. To be in his arms again,smelling him and feeling him on his skin was something Bucky dreamed about for weeks. Years while being locked inside his mind. But unfortunately,Steve let go. For a moment,while he didn’t feel the soldier against him. He felt like he just dissapeared. But when he looked up and saw him,he knew he was real. He was very real and back.
”Sure.” Bucky replied,walking inside and having a very quick look over the room he was in. It was nice,really nice. Much better than his apartment.
”Well,if it’s not too much trouble for you! I’d…love that!” The sergeant said,the smile still didn’t leave his face. Was his face stuck? It felt like it,but he didn’t care or mind. He thought about it for a second before turning his look over to Steve. The blue eyes,the blue shinning eyes. They were beautiful,just beautiful to look at. He saw alot of similar eyes like Steve’s. But none the same,none so pure. There was no way to describe them.
Steve hadn’t wanted to ever let go from Bucky, either, but he knew that he had to. He was back now… And of course Steve had many questions, starting with how this was possible at the first place.
Was Bucky frozen, too? Did it took S.H.I.E.L.D. That long to bring him back to life? That would explain hos the man had found him! Fury must have send him here to him.
No matter how lonely and lost Steve had been feeling just five minutes ago, he felt happy now. His brother, his best friend and the only one he had for his whole life was here; in that world that Steve didn’t understand.
In a world where Steve didn’t wanted to be… And suddenly this world was so much better than it had been. This apartment was a home again.. And it didn’t take anything but Bucky for it.
It was decorated in an old style, the Agents had tried their best to make Steve feel at home, but they failed. No matter how many antique furniture you put into an apartment, those coffee makers, the TV’s and phones would always destroy that ‘image’.
Once Bucky agreed on a cup of Coffee, Steve smiled up to him again and walked over to his open-kitchen, starting the machin so they could drink something while they talked.
Coffee didn’t have any affects on Steve, but it was still nice to drink something warm… “You need to tell me everything, Bucks…” It didn’t matter how tall or how big Steve was now; he was still just the kid from Brookyln Bucky had spend his whole life on while trying to safe him several times.
//Gone again. Night guys! I’ll try to be around more often. I promise!
Yeah, you too.
So… How have you been?
Fine… There’s nothing I can complain about.. And you?
Yeah, somebody had to be that. Happy New Year to you too.
…It was nice to see you again.
I’m not. Why would I? I just have a headache.
Oh…Right! Yesterday was New Year’s Eve…I can imagine that you drunk. —Happy new year…
Where are we going? To The Future! ( Closed )
Bucky stood there waiting for Steve to open,or someone else that might lived there. The minute he waited for the door to open was like an hour to him. His heart wouldn’t stop beating so hard and fast. It still felt like it was just going to explode. He was so nervous he wanted to just cry it all out. But what if someone else opened it? What then? A crying stranger infront of their door,that’s not normal,at all. Instead,Bucky kept the tears in. If he could keep the soldier in,he could also keep a few tears in.
When he heard steps inside,he took another deep breath. This was it,the moment of truth. The moment he finds out if it’s Steve in there or not. When the door opened and the tall,muscle blonde haired guy appeared Bucky couldn’t help but smile. Smile out of happiness. It was Steve,Steve Rogers. His long time best friend,brother. It was the impossible. His brain just froze. The smile quickly went away and a frown appeared. ”S-Steve…” He said,before swallowing hard. It was hard,so hard to speak. To swallow,to move. He froze. He couldn’t believe it. It was his voice,his everything. He wanted to move closer,to wrap his arms around Steve and hold him as tight as he can but he couldn’t. It was too soon and…just,he couldn’t even move from the shock. An awkward shock,but still a shock.
”S-Steve…I-I…” He couldn’t get himself to speak,again. In response,he nodded once and lowered his head. Trying not to look at the soldier in the eyes. The tears were close to escaping his eyes. Really close.
Steve froze himself, too, but after a few moments passed he remembered that Bucky never had been a guy of many words so he made the first step. —A huge one, to be accurate, before he wrapped his arms around the other one and made himself as small as he could only to lean his head against Bucky’s chest like he had done it back then when he had been small, breakable and ‘tiny’.
“I have to be dreaming…” He whispered in the next moment while he clung to his best friend.
For a few moments, they stood like that, Steve clinging to Bucky as if the moment he’d let the other one go, he’d disappear again —And honestly? That was what he was indeed afraid of.
Bucky had apeared out of the blue; what i fhe’d leave exactly like that, too? “C-Come in…”, The soldier muffled once he had managed to pull away, his eyes locked with his own feet while he stepped to the side and nodded.
They didn’t needed the neighbors hear or see him like this. Really not.
“I… —I can make you coffee!” And there was a spark in Steve’s eyes when he said that, blue eyes finally lifting up to lock with Bucky’s while he smiled just a little more.
Even if that was a dream or if he had died and this was his heaven..He’d make the best out of it!
